Thursday, November 27, 2008


Hahaha, it's a joke. Get it?

Ahem. Anyway.

Master and I are in our respective states for T-Day break, and in the two days we've been apart I've masturbated twice.

I'm actually kind of weirded out by it. And I'm weirded out by how weirded out I am.

When I was in high school and junior, I masturbated on a fairly regular basis - at least three times a week, sometimes every night. Then I came to college, I became sexually active soon after, and my desire to masturbate just... petered out. However, it didn't stop - sometimes I get the urge to masturbate mere minutes after I've had sex, so it leads me to conclude that my sex drive and my masturbation drive are separate, though highly influenced by one another. That, and I find the act of masturbation to be a turn-on in itself; I don't need to fantasize about sex to get turned on because thinking about masturbating turns me on.

Even when I'm apart from Master for the summer, though, my masturbation drive doesn't really rebound much. Once, maybe twice a week is it - except for when I suddenly get a streak and I'll masturbate three times a day. It's all very erratic.

Which leads me to wonder why I suddenly have the drive now. I know that some women's sex drives are influenced by their menstrual cycle, but I no longer have a menstrual cycle, thanks to my nifty little IUD. Maybe I still have the hormone fluctuations, but not the external signs (i.e. the period). But I don't recall any regular changes in my sex drive even when I did have a period. It was basically random.

It's a little frustrating. I get thirsty when my body doesn't have enough liquid to perform essential cell functions; I get hungry for the same reasons. Sleepiness is a little more puzzling, but we generally understand that we get tired when our body has been running for too long without a chance to regenerate via sleep. But what triggers our levels of horniness? Why do I sometimes crave sex multiple times a day; why do I sometimes go for weeks during the summer without even thinking about touching myself?

I dunno. It's all very strange.

No comments: